The hardest thing to realize when I’m being right, is that I’m wrong.
*I just caught myself being right, being firmly planted in my rightness. When I suddenly burped out loud, “I’m wrong!” I had to repeat it a few times to anchor it.
I realized that even though what I was saying was correct, I was stuck in a blind frame of “I’m right.” I was trying to show another that they were wrong… to help them. (Says I.) This is, of course, the norm.
How to help without making wrong? How to empower, rather than correct? How to be in the conversation (in its connected aliveness) rather than trying to end the conversation (come to a point of divisive right or wrong)?
When I see how I’m wrong, I release the other from being wrong, and the possibility of something greater than “right” emerges.
My experience of realizing that I’m wrong served more to break the spell I was under. It didn’t throw me to the other side into feeling wrong, i.e., bad. I actually felt excited. It was an exciting discovery! I’m wrong! Wow! I’m awake now. It felt vibrant. I was no longer trapped in being right.
By realizing my approach and energy was “wrong” I actually became more right, dynamically speaking. I felt more alive and more free. And I released the other from whatever need I had of being better than them.
That’s the magic of owning and clearing a projection: when I stop insisting that another is a jerk and instead own that I can be a jerk, I don’t become a jerk, rather my jerk is liberated and integrated… and softens, then disappears. When I shift from you’re wrong to I’m wrong, I don’t become wrong, but rather “wrong” softens and disappears. We both become clearer, more free… and more connected.